
“Chloe Kelly thumped home her winning penalty for England against Nigeria. At 111km per hour, it was more powerful than any Premier League goal in 22-23” Mailonline
It’s just not that long ago that the papers were debating whether women’s football was ever going to be as interesting as the men’s. It’s in fact not long ago that the FA still banned women playing football.
And now look.
There are many societal expectations that we all grow up with. Some are about gender and physicality. Some are deeply personal.
Its never a good idea to manage expectations, either for yourself or for others. Breaking them is a better idea.
Harriet Taylor Mill was the wife of renowned philosopher John Stuart Mill. He acknowledged her contribution to his published works and ideas, but history has largely overlooked her. A philosopher in her own right, she said, in the 1850s: “We deny the right of any portion of the species to decide for another portion what is and what is not their proper sphere. The proper sphere for all human beings is the largest and highest which they are able to attain to.”
And 150 plus years on still stereotypes persist, and still assumptions are made.
In economic terms, at the current rate of progress (or lack of it) its now 286 years until there is gender equality according to the UN. This has got worse in recent years, and the rate of progress is clearly unacceptable. In terms of what needs to be addressed to create better equality patriarchal attitudes come high on the list, and has different impact in different cultures around the world. In the UK equal pay has been mandatory for decades, yet the gender pay gap means that women effectively work for free for a couple of months a year.
Revising deep rooted patriarchal attitudes to gender is slow. The audience for the Women’s World Cup gives us a start. The viewing was roughly equivalent to the Qatar men’s final fixture (which didn’t feature England of course). But turn to tennis and the Wimbledon men’s final was watched live by 11m people in the UK, the women’s final by 4.5.
So, attitudes linger, but at the same time history is being rewritten. Gerwig’s Barbie has smashed box office records. Just as the movie itself aspires to rewrite society’s expectations of women and girls, so too should it rewrite expectations of investment in women directors and movie lead actors.
Most women spend too much energy either trying to live up to unrealistic expectations or in disappointment at the inevitable failure to do so as Gloria eloquently explains in Gerwig’s movie.
But it isn’t only women. Unrealistic and stereotyped expectations ruin lots of people’s lives. In fact, as the suffragettes pointed out they could end lives too. As we wrote in Belonging, One of the reasons why RMS Titanic was such a terrible disaster in the early years of the twentieth century was that there weren’t enough lifeboats. There were slightly more in fact than the legal requirement, but this requirement was inadequate and only provided sufficient space for about a third of the people on board. The idea was that men would be… well, manly… about sinking. ‘Women and children first’ was the plan. And then it was the women and children in first class who literally were rescued first. The scale of the disaster was tragic and very public. So too was the longstanding call from the suffragette movement for the law to be changed so that there would be enough room for everyone to be rescued, regardless of gender, race, age or class, with the famous rallying cry: ‘Votes for women, boats for men!’
Don’t be confined by expectations, don’t live up to societal norms, conventional wisdom isn’t designed to allow you to fulfil your potential. In a world where change is the only constant, don’t be confined by anyone’s expectation, whether that is society, friends, family or your own internal monologue.
What motivates people?
September 21st, 2023With a global talent shortage, and as we get “back to school” for the autumn, after the summer holidays, it is important to unpick, and then refresh, motivation at work.
Season 2 of The Bear is streaming now on Disney+. Spoiler alert, the season leaves many unanswered questions (including will Carmy ever get out of the walk in fridge). During the course of the show we see the process whereby the Chicago sandwich café The Beef, which protagonist and Michelin starred chef Carmy inherited from his brother, is rebuilt and reopened as fine dining restaurant The Bear.
It’s clear that fine dining is Carmy’s passion. In fact, he concludes at one point that it is the only thing he cares about or that makes him happy, stating: “I didn’t have any of this fuckin’ bullshit” – by which he means “amusement or enjoyment” of any other aspect of his life.
It will be just as well if he is driven by the satisfaction of making customers swoon over his food, because the chances are that The Beef will have had been able to generate better profit than The Bear. Restaurateur Russell Norman of Polpo points out that “if you own a restaurant with a Michelin star, you will lose money. If you own a restaurant with two Michelin stars, you will lose even more money.” As MoneyWeek recently pointed out, Domino’s Pizza on the other hand generates a ROCE of close to 30% and an EBIT margin of 20%.
People are driven by a passion to be the best and to give back as well as by making money.
In a fairy tale moment in long running reality TV show “Say Yes to the dress”, about Bridal Store Kleinfield in NYC, star designer Pnina Tornei allows the sale of one gown at less than half price, because she says she is not only working to make money (the average Pnina gown goes for more than $4000) but also in the business of “making beautiful gowns for brides and of making their dreams come true”. Of course, this is a reality TV set up, which sees Pnina’s dresses highly promoted, but it kind of works because we Say Yes fans all recognise some truth in the story we are told.
This is important because it is relevant to how we create a strong culture at work. If the only motivation of the ExCo and company planning is financial, then the culture is unlikely to stay robust during difficult economic times.
A 40 year research study, from the American Psychological Association, has proved in fact that “extrinsic” (bonuses etc) and “intrinsic” (being motivated about the work) operate jointly to produce the best work performance.
And as EssenceMediacomX ceo Ryan Storrar recently wrote: “Fundamentally, people need to be able to look at themselves in the mirror and feel good about going to work”. Ensuring that there’s satisfaction from doing excellent work and from fulfilling purpose is the job of every leader and manager.
The latest Edelman trust survey reveals that more than two thirds of employees believe that “having societal impact is a deal breaker when it comes to considering a job”.
CEOs are expected to take a position on climate change, discrimination, wealth gap, immigration as well as on how their employees are treated. Businesses are now more trusted than any other institution, and with this trust comes high expectations that business should “advocate for the truth”.
Fulfilling commitments to wider stakeholders in terms of people, communities and planet is now on most UK companies’ radar. But we must not ignore the drive to excellence and mastery too. Carmy’s partner in The Bear, Sydney, makes a simple omelette for Carmy’s sister, and The Bear’s exhausted and pregnant project manager, Sugar. We follow it closely, eggs, sieved through a mesh are beaten by fork; the omelette is cooked fast, and then filled with Boursin and sprinkled with some crushed sour cream and onion crisps. Sugar thinks it is divine. Sydney states that making that omelette and taking care of Sugar is absolutely the best part of her day. After all, as she states in series one all her motivation is about the work: “I wanna cook for people and make them happy and give them the best bacon on earth.”
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